INFPs Have the Easy Path to Self-Actualization
Introverted Feeling’s Superpower
The Strength Nobody Wants
There are times as an INFP I lament how society doesn’t value my cognitive stack. The introverted feeling (Fi) us INFPs lead with is easily the most useless function for generating income. Corporations aren’t desperately seeking self-aware people with strong moral compasses that value human connection and relationships over materialistic gain. Fi isn’t even valued socially as the relationship masters of the universe extroverted feelers generally despise the seeming selfishness of Fi. Then our second function, extroverted intuition (Ne) while having some creative value is still serving the whims of our Fi and tends to distract us and send us down creative rabbit holes rather than focus us on accomplishing productive tasks. Our top two functions make us appear to be quiet self-absorbed losers with ADHD.
The functions that society really values in us starts with our third function introverted sensing (Si) which is just enough to give us some skill with routines and resilience but the function is low enough that it has all the professional certainty of a child. Finally the real money making function extroverted thinking (Te) is in our 4th slot and it gives us deep uncertainty and makes us very uncomfortable. The function most valued by businesses is a profound weakness for us. On top of all that the highly valued social function extroverted feeling (Fe) and the cool sporty function extroverted sensing (Se) are both in our shadow leaving us outcasts of both the career world and the social world.
The Blessing In Disguise
Our unwanted strengths though are a blessing in disguise because of all 16 types INFPs are the ones who don’t have any choice but to develop our weaknesses. An ESTJ or ESFJ for example can live their entire lives in their top two functions and thrive financially and socially. Developing their lower functions is an optional luxury. Every other type has a valuable social or business function in their top two with either sensing, thinking, or Fe. The ENFP comes close to our problem but being an extrovert with Te in the third slot is significantly better than an introverted feeler with 4th Te. ISFPs may struggle as well but their second slot extroverted sensing (Se) is very practical and valued socially and in trade work. The blessing though is we start developing our 3rd and 4th functions much earlier than other types. We can’t get through school, get a job, or hold down a relationship without developing our Si and Te. This causes INFPs to become well rounded self-aware people at a young age.
The Self-Actualization Superhero — Introverted Feeling (Fi)
What society doesn’t realize though is that introvert feeling is the luxury function everybody wants but doesn’t know about. Fi is the compass to fulfillment. It knows what you truly want and desire. It’s not distracted by the superficial markers of achievement like materialism, fame, money, and power. It doesn’t need outside validation and accolades to feel good about itself. Fi is a direct link to your deepest purest desire. Fi knows itself and forgives itself. The combination of having Fi as your strongest function and being forced to develop your weaknesses to survive gives us INFPs a direct route to self-actualization. In fact the reason introverted feeling seems so useless to business is because free markets are almost entirely concerned with meeting the first 4 needs of the pyramid while Fi is laser focused on the top.
Simple Truth Not Big Achievements
I remember sitting in Psychology 101 in college as the professor explained Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs and lamented on how rare it is that anyone ever reaches self-actualization. He concluded that only a select few that have accomplished great things like presidents, CEOs, or philanthropists have ever reached their full potential. I remember feeling frustrated because I had no desire for that greatness.
Now after understanding type and watching my life unfold I can see that INFPs with Fi have the shortest path to self-actualization. What makes self-actualization so difficult for most people is that they think they need widespread public validation to feel fulfilled. They chase the wind of fame, influence, and fortune thinking that it will fill the void they feel inside. Little do they know that the void inside is a black hole that cannot be satisfied. I came to the conclusion early on that presidents and CEOs are most likely not self-actualized. They have probably torn their souls into pieces with compromises and unethical behavior that has either destroyed their consciences or they need a cocktail of drugs to sleep at night. This is not self-actualization. Self-actualization is the quiet peace of having all levels of your needs met, being forgiven of your sins, accepting your flaws, and finding fulfillment in the simplest joys of God, family, work, and nature. The key to self-actualization is not great achievement but in knowing oneself and realizing small virtues and simple truth is the path to peace. Great achievement will be taken away and forgotten but the inner calm of a rightly ordered life and mindset is not easily stolen.
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